Seriously?…You Can’t Do ANYTHING?!

Hey did I ever tell you about that time I got 

My bike stolen?

It was the same day that my back window

Got smashed in.

How do I remember?

Because the person that stole my bike

Had to smash my car window to get

To my bike that was in the car.



NE hoo, it’s kinduva crazy story

It was when I worked at a middle

School in the not so nice part of town.

I think Will Smith would have had 

His hands full with the type of people

That made trouble in these neighborhoods


So one day I go out at lunchtime

To find my trunk open and my bike missing.

As I went to close the trunk, I hear a

Crunching sound and see pieces

Of my back window fall onto the trunk


Through my now 1/4 convertible

I could see that there was a huge rock

That had apparently went through my

Window, bounced off my radio and

Fell onto the passenger side floor mat.

‘Nother bummer…


So now I’m a grown man stalking campus 

Asking other grown men if they’ve seen

My bicycle. 

I couldn’t have felt more low until I 

In fact, found another grown-up who

Had seen my bicycle and saw when

Someone took it.


Oh hellz yeah! 

I was ready to rampage!!

What did he look like? Let’s catch him

Then use him as the support beam 

For a bike ramp.


“It was a kid,” he said

And my heart immediately sank…


But he said he saw it all on camera

Because he was the security guard.

Part of me was excited, but another

Part of me kinda wondered like

WTF is he getting paid for if he 

Literally saw someone break into

My car and decided that it would

Be better to wait to tell the person

That he saw what happened 

Rather than you know…

Maybe doing something?!?!


So anyway, we call the cops

Cuz you know we got 

Security cameras so at least

We know who did it.



So now the police are there

And they’ve come out of their

Cars to ask for a statement from

The security guard (main witness)

They go back with him to look at

The video tape and come back out

About 5 minutes later with empty

Notepads and pens in pockets


They start walking towards me and

Without missing a beat, ask me if

I’d like to even file a report because

Chances are they wouldn’t even

Find the kid who did it.


Of course not with that attitude!

I thought to myself…

But what I actually said was,

Didn’t you find anything on the video?

They turn and say that they couldn’t

Really do anything because the quality

Of the video was too low. They couldn’t

Make out a face.


Great, so security thinks they’re

Watching reality television on a really low

Quality screen all day.

The police have no confidence that they

Can solve crimes and the only redeeming

Quality about the whole situation is that

I know it was a human being.


Awesome! At least we now know it’s not

Some pissed off hawk that had had

Enough of humans and was going on a

Crime spree.


I don’t know where I am really going

From here, I just thought it was a funny


The police never found my bike, nor did

We ever get to find out who broke my window

Although it was clearly a kid from the school.


There is one thing that is true however,

This is a story, it most likely didn’t happen

Exactly this way, because I’m relying on

My memory.


This one got away from me, but let me

Share something with you.

Memory is a fickle thing, you can believe

In it, but it doesn’t mean it will always

Serve you well. I meant to tell a story

About a famous study about memory

But I’ll just leave you with this instead:


Your mind makes up stories that help

Your memory fit the context of your

Current state of mind. Memory is

Rarely 100% accurate, but what

Matters most is that your memories

Accurate or not, should help

Serve you in making decisions in

The future that will help you to

Create more positive memories.


Jerry “memories” Washington


P.S. What side did the rock fall on

In my car? Don’t remember? It’s

Probably because your mind didn’t

Find it to be an important detail.

I would like you to consider that

Our memory isn’t perfect and neither

Is anyone on this planet.

We all want to improve however and

Although our memory supposedly gets

Worse when you get older, you can

Actually improve your life overall

With help from your friends at

Project SELFFY. Talk soon…

Leave a Reply

Our Gift To You

Join our mailing list to receive an exclusive Full-Body Workout. 
Free 20-min FULL- Body Workout